Wednesday, January 18, 2012

The Posser

Watch out we're "airing our dirty laundry".
What is that you may ask?  We are getting to know each other well but it is only after we discovered its genius that we acquired the name.  Posser.  No, no - not Po-ser.  PoS-Ser! I have no idea why it's called that.  You can research it on Wiki when they are no longer on strike.  I'm sure it is fascinating.  Inventions always are.

It is a love-hate relationship in the works.  Don't get me wrong.  We are so thankful for our chipper neighbor who kindly shared her tricks with us (she might have laughed like Ursula from The Little Mermaid when she drove away) but, "Thanks Christine, we're loving using it!"  As the oxygen increased to my brain, from the vigorous agitation, inspiration began to burst forth.  It could have been the fact that I was in that small square room for so long by myself but honestly, just think of this tool's potential.  Tony Horton on p90x really needs to know about this.  Maybe he should include the 'Posser Extreme'.   We're getting good at it so he could hire us and add another DVD right after the Syngestics.  Seems perfectly sensible to me.  "Oh yeah, we're feelin' the burn Tony...our heart rate is up...our arms/shoulders/gluts are ripped...the torture is accomplishing something."  It really could be a total body workout depending on the angle you stand and then how you choose to spring it through the load.  Jason, rather than admiring my turn at the posser and how I governed it, laughed at me.  We switched turns - at which point I opted out of Jillian Michaels for the day, grabbed another piece of coping dark chocolate (fully sweetened) and then I mocked him for not pressing through the intense maltreatment.  "Toughen up!  You can do it.  It's a workout so you'll look good when you're done."  At his frustrated peak he calmly said, "We'll save that last bit for tomorrow.  This. Is. It.  O.K.?"  However, our overly energetic 10 year old son, showed us both up - plossing out 5 loads (small ones, mind you, but still!).  We did bribe him with $1/load.  Motivation always helps.

"Here is your posser
now transform into a human agitator."
Up until now I bought into the idea that laundry rooms should be tranquil, pleasant and almost spa like.
Look how exquisite this room is?  Relaxing.  Clean.  Organized.
In the 90's I bought little country-cute laundry signs to adorn the walls of my pleasurable washroom.  "Ah, how cute!  How happy and clean!"  If you really want to be cheery in this place you can use "CHEER" to clean and fragrant your laundry.


Scrap that.  We're into the posser.  We humanly agitate until you feel every muscle scream and your brain feels slightly shook up.  That's when you know that load is clean.  You should never-ever have a tranquil and cute washroom IF using the posser and/or washboard.  Never.  It would be false advertisement.  Completely misleading.  Absolutely paradoxical.


Oh don't feel sorry for us.  It is so relative and definitely not forever.  It could be much worse.  Look at that wooden one in the middle (pictured above).  {gasp}  Eek!  Now that thing would add a little tricep-twist to the whole mix.  Just now, as I am about to publish this, another kind neighbor (we live on a whole block of them) offered for us to do laundry in her machine.  It will break it up a bit.  Next time.  ...or at least until our muscles rise to the occasion and our hands callus in defense.  Until then we're thankful but will you praise Him for inventors and electricity....then give that humming machine of yours a big kiss!  You are blessed.  Richly.

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